Sites that can help
Winston's Wish is a charity for bereaved children. The website includes a graffiti wall in which you can express your thoughts and feelings.
The Cuisle Centre services include Play Therapy for children with cancer and for children whose parents have been diagnosed with cancer.
|
A nationwide support group for young people who have or had cancer, and also for their brothers, sisters and friends.
Stepping Up is a website full of transition information for young people, with long-term illnesses, moving to adult healthcare services. |
Your Parent's Illness & Changing Friendships
A lot of friends don't really understand what it's like to have a parent who is sick. Even though you understand that, you might feel really hurt and let down when your friends aren't there for you in the way you would like. Maybe they just don't know what to say or do.
Reasons for this may be:
- Your friends might be worried about saying the wrong thing, so they say nothing.
- They don't know if it's okay to mention the illness or your parent. You might have to start the ball rolling.
- They are worried about imposing on your family time so are shy to call or visit.
- They think their lives are boring and unimportant compared to yours and don't know if they should talk about normal things.
- They might say something that annoys or upsets you - but remember they didn't mean to; it's usually because they don't understand.
Staying in touch
Try to stay in touch with your friends. Let them know that even if you can't always go out, you still like to be invited to things. It's important to have some fun and take your mind off things sometimes.
I'm a friend supporting a young person
So your friend or someone in their family has an illness. This may be one of the toughest things your friend will ever experience. Support from their friends will be vital for them during this time. That sounds like a lot of pressure on you but just remember, they're still your same old friend: they've just found themselves in a really crappy situation.
What you can do to support your friend
- Talk to them. Get in contact with them.
- Find out information about their family members illness.
- Hang out with them. Sometimes you'll need to have serious conversations, but sometimes laughing and doing fun stuff will be just what your friend need.
- Keep things as normal as possible.
- Things you could say to your friend; 'I care about you and I'm here for you', 'Do you want to talk about anything in particular?', 'Call me whenever you need to talk'.
Some tips for what not to do
It is always handy to know a few thing to avoid!
- If you are sick, avoid visiting your friend or their family member. Just give them a call or text instead.
- Don't force your friend to talk about their situation.
- Always check ahead before bringing extra visitors - this can be tiring and overwhelming.
- Don't be over the top with sympathy.
- Don't say you understand, unless you really do.